What the L(f)uck!!

I would have never done it, if not for the lure of the treat offered by my friend. There are somethings which we are not very proud of but still enjoyed doing it. This is one of those.
It was watching the movie LUCK on the big screen.
Starring Sanjay Dutt, Imran Khan , Shruti Hassan and Danny Denzongpa the movie is based on a feeble plot, filled with useless punchlines, meaningless one liners, mediocre acting, little or no action, snail's pace and well practically no attention to details. It was may be made keeping in mind an audience who will just accept anything shown on a big screen.
The movie's central theme is Luck and lucky people. And look how lucky the guys are:
Mithunda: After 35 years in a army, being a hero of three wars (three?? what the hell? which three?? India has fought jus 2 wars in the last 38 years.) Despit of surviving three wars he is just a Major at the age of 55. Has no money to cure his termianally ill wife and guess what? he is lucky.!!!
Imran Khan: Father dies of heart attack after a stock market scam, he is neck deep in debt, cant tell his mom about it, US visa gets rejected thrice and If he does not pay back 20 crores in 2 months he is in deep deep shit. And guess what he is LUCKY tooo???
Komal Chauthala(the short hockey wiz of chak de!) : First things first, she is a Pakistani!!! Are we still goin to debate her luck. Further, born in Pakistan, sold by parents for a mere 15000 rupees (may be Pakistani rupees), who rides lame camels and cleans their shit for a living. And she is LUCKY too.
The only genuinely lucky person would be Ravi Kishen, who despite of raping and murdering 13 girls still survives the noose. Well in India thats not particularly lucky either. Here even terrorists donot reach the noose. He was actually unlucky to be there in the first place.

Well then the USP of the movie : The dialogues, all of 'em in irritating yet amusing third person.
They provoke, the blabber and ramble on with no reason whatsoever. Be it the ones like: "Tamang logon ko khareedta nahi hai... (you are left gasping for the punchline).... Bhaade mein leta hai!" What??? or the one that I call the most "Secular" dialogue in the history of Indian cinema: "Lakshmi tuje tika lagane aayi hai aur tu Eid ka chaand bana hua hai!" Danny Denzongpa has the best and worst of it!
Komal Chauthala, who I feel could have done with less than quarter of what she spoke. Be it provoking the Chinese guy unnecessarily or the one where she says: "Wahaan main unth(camel) ke neeche thi aur yahaan ghoda(gun) mere sir ke oopar hai!" Its as if she starts it and forgets to end it.
Coming to Shruti Hassan, have some standards!! After all you are the Indian Al Pacino's daughter. She mugs up those lines and delivers them with so much of caution that she forgets to act through it! But well with the bikini scene and ocassional cleavage flashes she among all, holds your attention. The only place where she resembles her father is in the number of roles. She does an unnecessary double role maybe to jus prove a point : "When Dad can do 10, I can do at least 2"
Albiet filled with cliches, LUCK takes even those much further. Like the scene in which Ravi Kishen the baddy shells out about a thousands rounds from his machine guns on Imran khan who is walking straight onto him and still even a single bullet fails to hit him. And the scene where he tries to rape Shruti Hassan. Well after raping 13 girls isn't he supposed to be a "pro" in it??? And he forgets to even lock the door through which later our hero charges in to save the heroine.
After all these which conviniently defy logic, rationality, common sense and sometimes even physics, they keep the Bazooka for the end.
You just can't assimilate how lucky Imran Khan is when you find out that his heart is on the right side of his chest. After that, its pretty much impossible to take any more shit and rightfully the makers of the movie knew it too, So they thankfully end the movie at that.
All said watch it with friends you will enjoy the stupidity of the so-called Action thriller.
And hmmm yeah... Best of LUCK, you would need every bit of it!

Shailesh R Nadar.
11:32 am, Jul 29, 2009.

They killed Savita... You B***ards!

"90 % of the guys like savita bhabhi, while the rest 10% lie!"

Try finding a guy who would refute this!!
Thats the reason, I could not believe myself when I read this morning that the Savita Bhabhi website was banned in India as per a directive issued by the government. After moral policing and tapping phones this is hitting a new bottom for the hypocritical Indian government and to no less effect, the Indian society. But banning a comic strip (well... not very comic, but c'mon, at the end of the day its just a comic strip). This is goin too far.

A country of the Kamasutra: one of the most well versed treatise on sex ever written, the land of Khajuraho, just could not withstand a desi Debonnaire. Hail the Indian society which declares 'talking about sex' anti-social and taboo, the precise reason why I refrain to put a pic of Savita Bhabhi for the post, lest my post be branded immoral and indecent.

To trivialize the website as just another source of porn is not only short sighted but also grossly bigotrous. It was symbol of something new which (though not intentionally, but) tried to open up the society from its prior narrow, intolerant self. It was a sign of the rising new thought where sex is not a matter joke or something taboo and talking about it is nothing to be ashamed of. A focre which had the potential to break the shackles of the restricted, sexually repressed Indian society.

But well, they say it was contaminating the Indian society, disrespecting women and vilifying the Indian family system. But c'mon whom are we kiddin?? A country where a woman is raped every 27 minutes and has more than 20,000 cases of rape reported every year, where female foeticide and infanticide are still not uncommon, where women are still mistreated everyday in millions of households across the country. Don't get me wrong, but we donot need a comic strip to teach us how to disrespect women. We have a PhD in it already.

Last but not the least, the guys who decide whether or not we must have access to the website are plainly too old to appreciate the character in its raw form, leave alone the 'class act' called Savita Bhabhi.

As Pralhad Kakkar rightly puts it: "She will be reborn on CDs, DVDs or as the heroine of videogames. She will remain every man's fantasy. She will become a cult thing. "


Shailesh R Nadar.
10:52 pm, Jul 19, 2009.

PS: Read the fitting Obituary of Savita Bhabhi in Times Of India.
Savita Bhabhi's dies.,, Hail Indian Hypocrisy.
And guess what? its written by a woman.

A blog about "blogs"!!

I started blogging 2 years ago. With nothing interesting to write, very righteously stopped for the last 6 months or so.
Of late being bombarded by blogs through status messages, some even through personal 'pings' by people you least expect to blog (thankfully so for some like Chamiya.) I felt like starting again.
Blogs are supposed to entertain, intrigue and captivate the audience. But now the parameters have changed... Have got nothin to do?? lets blog. No movie to watch?? oh lets blog. Pained with acads?? lets blog.. pained in life?? lets blog. happy with life?? lets blog again. No net?? Lets blog. (and publish later without any further delay.) nobody to listen to your crap?? lets crap in the blog.No more a Soc-Sec?? lets blog. Finally and very truthfully "Absolutely jobless in a six month intern???" Oh sure! what more! Lets blog the shit out of it.

I would start with a disclaimer: I am not a stud blogger and the views presented below are strictly my own.
So sue me if you can!!!

Vishal aka Condom a very nice guy otherwise but when it comes to the blogosphere he is a merciless butcher. Leaves you wondering why we even live. You feel like buying of a 9mm beretta and blowing your brains out and more so blowing his out. (thats the fun in blogging, the blogger's always safe.)

Next comes Satyanveshi... yeah you know him... try harder... Bingo!! He is Mmanu Chaturvedi with a "double m" remember. His latest blog is a rigorous 3rd degree rant about how he fell head over heels (read became uncontrollably DESPO) for this MA chic and how his dick.. oops heart goes out for her.

Then comes good old friend Tejas. He is a plain stud, very philosophical but still a stud. I still could not fathom the reason why he took to blogging. May be he finished mugging?? Ok guys if you are blogging, then for the good of others let "philosophy" be the last topic you choose.

Now the big shots.
Revered Soc-Sec of Saras - Oval.
His blog 'read ovals mind' should have been 'keep reading oval's mind'... 'Keep on reading oval's mind'.... "Still reading oval's mind"...Zzzzzzzz.
So long are his posts that you forget the first part by the time you reach the last part. Well dude, people are jobless... but not to this extent.

Finally the God of Fart and the Queen of Gossip. The one and only Chamiya.
First words that come to my mind-- Why chammo why!!!!????
Being in Pune doing (read screwing up) his six month intern at FIAT and increasing the rate at which the company is already sinking, Chamiya feels away from home not being able to gossip. So the dude opens an online forum to gossip especially Saras gossip and hits the rock bottom with his first post about how ST kissed a guy after getting drunk... that too in excruciating detail.
We must not be expecting further posts from our dude as he is hell bent on saving his intern, since his manager unleashed hell on him after he fooled him to take a 2 week vacation.

All said. each of these blogs have their USP. arbitness of Condom to the give-up-ness of Mmnau, from the art lashing of Tejas to the Royal rant of Oval. Oh and Chamiya... Words fail me dude, Word fail me.
But I must give it to you... you are free to write SHIT in blogs... Isn't that why blog sounds a lot like bog.???

PS(to the junta involved): It's in the good spirit of Blogging. You are free to rape-its...

Screw u Shaastra!!!!

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Quiz1 blues!!

And there it was.. I could see it coming. It was just Thursday and I could feel the euphoria of the “weekend”.. Weekends are gen special with Saturday standing out as the best day of the week. In fact, I feel there must be more Saturdays in a week. For two reasons:

• You don have to do anything on Saturdays and
  
• You don have to do anything on the day that follows..

48 guaranteed hours of stress-less life… what more can one ask for!!

Gen fart apart, this weekend seems much more special and not jus a 2 day holiday. After a week of back to back quizzes, a week of three-hr-sleep nights, a week filled with anxiety, skepticism and fear, it looks like a perfect refuge. A couple of days to sit back and relax, to defragment my mind crammed with Man-Tech, Engines, Heat Transfer and Turbo-machines and make space for the agony that follows on Tuesday, Dyn of Mach. Elements.

Still its peaceful.. in the sense I have at least got time to smile and relax(and write this post) amidst the Quiz-storm…

PS: This Quiz was more painful in a way for I mugged with Mr. Bulla, a 'stud' who gets all stud-level doubts barely hours (literally hours) before the quiz... confusing me in the final moments.

Shailesh R Nadar

1:46 pm, Sep 13, 2007.

Still a Virgin????...... Aaaah cut the crap..

It was sunday afternoon... absolutely nothing to do... so went around personalising the stuff in my new room #360 SARAS.. by writing my name on the door, window, almirah. "Virgin" in cursive as in the virgin of "Virgin Atlantic".
It was then it suddenly struck how weird my name was. The name I hated at first.The name which invited oohs and aahs whenever someone heard it. Everyone.. believe me each and everyone, be it seniors or batchmates made a point to ask "So.... still a virgin haan?".. What the f**k... "Well how many times have you ****** dude" was the way I almost always wanted to retort, but i never did. In third year.. and I still encounter people who end up asking the same question.
Well time passed and I started liking my name... albeit christened "virgin" for the rest of the stay in the campus and the funda behind the name as lame as "You never ****** ** (oops!! censored by CCB) before coming to IIT.. so u r a virgin"... (Well in Chandler Bing's words "Can it.. BE any lamer??"). Still it didnt seem that bad. Not as bad as others.. (The CBB (Censor Board of Blogging) disallows me to put those names up here, so I ideally refrain from doin so.)
Infact now I feel happy or even proud (as u may say)..of the same name. proud enough that I have even created a sign (pic above) to paste on my door. Ironical is'nt it??

Shailesh R Nadar
4:50 pm, Aug 12, 2007.

P.S.-- The nick names at IIT Madras are strictly given by seniors after an extensive interactive session("ragging" in crude words). And these are the names which are carried forward for the next 4 or 5 yrs.

F**k spitters!!

Too harsh as it may sound.. but they(spitters) are one of those few people whom I feel like thrashihng black and blue whenever I see them.
But little did I know that this hatred towards a particular class would lead to me getting into a duel(verbal though) with a loafer of our building.
A few days back that bugger was standing at the corner of our terrace munching paan (as it seemed to me) constantly spitting on the whitewashed wall and parapet right above our window. Once I ignored, twice I did, but how much can a man take.(..those who take more are not men, but spineless !@#!@#$%)
I went forward and in the softest of my tones asked why was he doing so. Like a beast(ugliest of all) ready to pounce he started shouting: not important it was completely senseless anyway. One thing lead to another and ended up me showing him the 'finger'(You know which one!)
Matter reached Dad. No probs for he believes a lot in me to scold me on such trivial matters... Dad though was happy for I called spade a spade. He sympathised with me but gave me two important lessons:
1.Society will change only if its smallest contituents, individuals themselves change. Its no one man show.
2.Donot go out changing people, they themselves would if they want to. Be the way you are
Today I see him in the same spot above our house munching the same shit, and then look at the slab above our window there is nothing today. I knew i couldn't stop him from spitting elsewhere, but on my house... HELL I DID!
But now, I see many more spitters(may be I notice them now)... Someone spits on the way, still I don say "What the F**k!!!", I don ask "Why!!". I flinch a bit, go around it and make my way home...

Shailesh R Nadar
10:15 am, June 21, 2007.

Breakfast… at Mummy’s

IIT till now has given me many things I never dreamt of, and made me something I never was, memories I will cherish all through life and blah blah blah c’mon u know what crap follows!!!

Bottom line- It has given me a lot (too many to name)!!!

But remember everything comes at a price, only that the price (or one of the many prices I paid) this time was my “breakfast”. Dats precisely wat happens when “the probability if u having breakfast” starts depending on factors like

- the time u wake up
- climate of the day
- food in the mess
- ur moood! and blah blah…

BIG DEAL!! U may think. But it has played a huge role in reducing my

already pathetic weight of 59 kgs by more than 9% (9.32 to be precise!) to 53.5 kgs in two years. That may seem insignificant to many.. but it took me 18 long years to gather those 59 odd kgs.

Big bro (until two years back) used to get scolded (a lottt!!) for matters regarding studies. But somehow I managed to beat him in the degree as well as the volume of the scolds for reasons ranging from ‘carelessness’ to ‘singing out loud’ (shouting- dats wat Dad says it is!) and ‘not bathing in time ’ to ‘idleness’ (see lil’ bro’s diversified family business!!). to the present hot topic for the last two weeks-

“Not eating properly back at IIT”

This blog is written out of the exasperation, anguish and guilt arising from the repeated interrogation and cross-examination (by Mom and Dad) about my eating schedule at IIT. Sometimes it becomes rather difficult with Mom (who is endowed with argumentative skills of a criminal lawyer) when she traps me with my own words!!

Will someone plz tell ‘em breakfast at mess, is not ‘steaming dosais with milagai podi (the best sidish ever known to mankind) coupled with neatly cut boiled eggs with the right amount of pepper and salt sprinkled and a glass of cold milk luring u to gulp it down.’

It is walking to the mess in the hot sun, standing in line with a steel plate eagerly hoping that the vadai would be less salty and the idlis will be a bit softer. Its hoping against hope that the sambhar would be less spicy and the puris would be less elastic. Moreover there is no ‘Mom’ standing beside to make sure, I eat every bit till the end.

Thats “mess” for you!! My friends!!
But…

For the next two months,
Mornings will be yummy!!

For I shall have,
Breakfast at Mummy’s…

-- Shailesh R Nadar

7:15 pm May 24, 2007.

Breakfast… at Mummy’s

IIT till now, has given me many things I never dreamt of, and made me something I never was, memories I will cherish all through life and blah blah blah.. c’mon, u know what crap follows!!!
(inset: The Giga Mess at IIT Mdras)
Bottom line- It has given me a lot (too many to name)!!!

But remember.. everything comes at a price. Only that, the price (or one of the many prices I paid) this time was my “breakfast”. Dats precisely wat happens when “the probability if u having breakfast” starts depending on factors like
- the time u wake up
- climate of the day
- food in the mess
- ur moood! and blah blah…

BIG DEAL!! U may think. But it has played a huge role in reducing my already pathetic weight of 59 kgs by more than 9% (9.32 to be precise!) to 53.5 kgs in two years. That may seem insignificant to many.. but it took me 18 long years to gather those 59 odd kgs.

Big bro (until two years back) used to get scolded (a lottt!!) for matters regarding studies. But somehow, I managed to beat him in the degree as well as the volume of the scolds for reasons ranging from ‘carelessness’ to ‘singing out loud’ (shouting- dats wat Dad says it is!) and ‘not bathing in time ’ to ‘idleness’ (see lil’ bro’s diversified family business!!). to the present hot topic for the last two weeks-
“Not eating properly back at IIT”

This blog is written out of the exasperation, anguish and guilt arising from the repeated interrogation and cross-examination (by Mom and Dad) about my eating schedule at IIT. Sometimes it becomes rather difficult with Mom (who is endowed with argumentative skills of a criminal lawyer) when she traps me with my own words!!

Will someone plz tell ‘em breakfast at mess, is not ‘steaming dosais with milagai podi (the best sidish ever known to mankind) coupled with neatly cut boiled eggs with the right amount of pepper and salt sprinkled and a glass of cold milk luring u to gulp it down.’

It is.. walking to the mess in the hot sun, standing in line with a steel plate eagerly hoping that the vadai would be less salty and the idlis will be a bit softer. Its hoping against hope that the sambhar would be less spicy and the puris would be less elastic. Moreover there is no ‘Mom’ standing beside to make sure, I eat every bit till the end.
Thats “mess” for you!! My friends!!
But…
For the next two months,
Mornings will be yummy!!
For I shall have,
Breakfast at Mummy’s…

Shailesh R Nadar
7:15 pm May 24, 2007.