Hail the Sleepers!

This is a tribute for all those brave souls who courageously take on the sleep monster each day and day after day in the 8 am slot every morning against the rising waves of boring lines. This one was written in one such class just for the sake of staying awake!!


When the sleep takes over,
There's nothing one can do.
Handwriting starts to hover
And I no more have a clue!

I try and hide for cover
Or crouch behind a bro;
For when the sleep takes over,
There's little one can do.

Life becomes a pain,
As the clock ticks real slow.
Prof. looks at me in disdain,
As my head begins to bow.

Ma limbs I shake,
My eyes I blink.
But neither I stay awake,
Nor am able to think.

My eyes are freakin' red,
My ass is fuckin' sore.
All I need is a bed
And I will cease to bore.

Now, I can no more rhyme,
As am in shit so deep.
Pardon me this time,
And let me go to sleep!!!

Shailesh R Nadar.
12:50 pm, Oct5, 2009.

They killed Savita... You B***ards!

"90 % of the guys like savita bhabhi, while the rest 10% lie!"

Try finding a guy who would refute this!!
Thats the reason, I could not believe myself when I read this morning that the Savita Bhabhi website was banned in India as per a directive issued by the government. After moral policing and tapping phones this is hitting a new bottom for the hypocritical Indian government and to no less effect, the Indian society. But banning a comic strip (well... not very comic, but c'mon, at the end of the day its just a comic strip). This is goin too far.

A country of the Kamasutra: one of the most well versed treatise on sex ever written, the land of Khajuraho, just could not withstand a desi Debonnaire. Hail the Indian society which declares 'talking about sex' anti-social and taboo, the precise reason why I refrain to put a pic of Savita Bhabhi for the post, lest my post be branded immoral and indecent.

To trivialize the website as just another source of porn is not only short sighted but also grossly bigotrous. It was symbol of something new which (though not intentionally, but) tried to open up the society from its prior narrow, intolerant self. It was a sign of the rising new thought where sex is not a matter joke or something taboo and talking about it is nothing to be ashamed of. A focre which had the potential to break the shackles of the restricted, sexually repressed Indian society.

But well, they say it was contaminating the Indian society, disrespecting women and vilifying the Indian family system. But c'mon whom are we kiddin?? A country where a woman is raped every 27 minutes and has more than 20,000 cases of rape reported every year, where female foeticide and infanticide are still not uncommon, where women are still mistreated everyday in millions of households across the country. Don't get me wrong, but we donot need a comic strip to teach us how to disrespect women. We have a PhD in it already.

Last but not the least, the guys who decide whether or not we must have access to the website are plainly too old to appreciate the character in its raw form, leave alone the 'class act' called Savita Bhabhi.

As Pralhad Kakkar rightly puts it: "She will be reborn on CDs, DVDs or as the heroine of videogames. She will remain every man's fantasy. She will become a cult thing. "


Shailesh R Nadar.
10:52 pm, Jul 19, 2009.

PS: Read the fitting Obituary of Savita Bhabhi in Times Of India.
Savita Bhabhi's dies.,, Hail Indian Hypocrisy.
And guess what? its written by a woman.

Mumbai bleeds, yet again!

For some it was yet another blast (or was it something else!) as a friend casually says it has been long since there were blasts! (long??? It ain't a Shah Rukh Khan movie).

For some it is a butt of their joke, as a a freshie looks at AN Roy on television and says 'Arey isko nahi maara kya??' followed by a smirk of triumph.

While for others it was one those precious moments wherein they can happily flaunt about how lucky they are, not to be a Mumbaiite!

While for most of us it was time to come up with the much cliché'd lines “Patil must resign.” “UPA sucks.” “What the hell is the govt upto?” “These cowardly bastards.” blah blah blah.

Well for me it was pretty much the same, frustration and anger out of the death of those innocent people with whom I used to share a city with. People who survive the one of the worst living conditions in the world (be it train travel, peak time rush or the crumbling infrastructure) to just survive, live and may be if the city gives them a chance, prosper. Those hundred dead citizens on whom lives of more than a thousand depended and who were near and dear to thousands of others. People don't deserve to die waiting for their train at CST after hard day's work by bullets fired by the so called fidayeen.

For me it was not only running through the above lines, swearing at the pakis, then the govt., then us people... as usual but this time around a bit more. It was not a blast, it was a few mad men prowling the city armed with heavy ammunition and modern weaponry. You never never know when a bullet whooshes past you and you are dead.

For me it was seeing the same places that I have been to many times smeared in blood. For me its the fear that all these happen a few miles from my home.

How can a group of ten terrorist hold a the financial capital of the country to ransom?? What was the govt doing?? Could it possibly have done something to stop it?? What did those 125 do to deserve such a death?? Will this incident make any difference in the govt policy?? there are thousand more questions of such kind! Which probably nobody can answer. Well I am not searching for answers either.

But life always limps back to normalcy within hours. Its one of the finest examples mumbaiites set to to the world as they send a clear message to the terrorists: “Do whatever, Life ain't gonna stop here!” The terror attacks on the city all through the years costed hundreds of lives but failed in their primary motive : terrorizing the people.

While talking to dad yesterday I had a feeling of deja vu of the morning of 12^th July 2006 -- I had evidently failed in my attempt to keep my Dad from going to office, barely hours after the infamous 7/11 train bombings . Just before leaving he turns towards me and says “Be proud! You are a Mumbaiite.”

You bet I am!

Shailesh R Nadar.
1:52 pm, Nov 28, 2008.

Solar torture.

For those who know him, the words above state the obvious. And for those who don’t shall never be able to fathom the pain he inflicts. They say that one doesnot even curse his worst enemies a cruelty of this order. Naah its not a third degree torture its jus sitting through 3 hours a week of “You know who” (if u got it till here u surely don’t need the name!), which is way better than my Energy brethren who bear 7 hrs a week of his nonsense.

He stutters, he bulbs, he rambles, he gropes and finally throws at you a set of jumbled words and leaves it to you to rearrange them to form a meaningful sentence. And all this while teaching (or that’s what he tries to do!) one of the driest stuff ever known to mankind. Those eyes which sparkle and try to search for answers of life in every corner of the class, while clearly demonstrating how confidently lost he is!

Its said that his lectures are finding better use elsewhere:

Rumor has it that the CIA is using the recorded tapes of his lecture to torture Al qaeda terrorists. It seems to work well as jus half way through they admit to all the charges framed against them.

These lectures even seem to find use in Anonymous rehab communities of people who have tried to commit suicide. They find comfort and more importantly inspiration from the sheer determination with which “you know who” rambles through the dry and who-gives-a-damn courses and yet finding a reason enough to live for the sake of research in that field!

The lectures are also being used as a standard for measuring patience. The number of minutes you can sit through his lectures have been given a status of standardized SI units, while research is still on for the cgs system.

Whatever it is, we still gotta sit three more weeks of the gory You know who’s torture!

Shailesh R Nadar.
9:52 pm, Oct 29, 2008.

Mad Mad Bang Bang!!!--The tale of two cities!!

Its been 5 months since I last posted... I almost forgot I even had a blog. Sometimes life, in my case intern renders you so jobless you start writing again.
Life (mine) is as miserable or as happening or as rocking as it always was... the only thing that had changed is the location... It used to be Bombay, then it was Chennai, now its Bangalore.

I have stayed in Chennai for the past three years and here in Bangalore for two months.
Abt the things I like better in Bang.
1) Ultimate cool weather (Being a resident of Mumbai and studying in Chennai) I d never slept under blankets during summer!!
2) Wide footpaths... understandable development was late and hence more planned.
3) Though its not a problem for me in Chennai.. being a tam but ppl in Bang almost everyone understands Hindi(added advantage!)
4) Lot of decent neighbourhood to stay in and city is far better planned with whitefield being a completely indus area. and is blessed with possible expansion in all directions.

The things I miss:
1)Biggest and the Best--- The Campus... the hostel and the times of lying idly on your chair watching sitcoms!!
2) The down to earth bus fares... Used to paying Rs 5 from IIT to Chennai Central i.e. 12-14 kms or roughly 1 hr of travel time. It seems unfair to pay double that for one fourth the distance.
And the small private vans!!! well they suck big time.. they thrust in 40-50 ppl in a small van.. don the traffic police notice it.. Try doin that in Chennai!!!
3) The Beach... a stroll on the Beasant Nagar beach and you forget everything... Even the torture in the hands of the HoD, or even the way you wrote your open book Finite Element Method End sem.
4) Retail prices slysha cheaper than Bang(I aint sure abt this) and way way cheaper than Mumbai (which is unfairly costly) with comparable facilities and a added advantage of a clean Beach.
5) Though it wont seem at the first look... infra is surely better. I have never been thrown of my feet standing in a bus and hit my head on the roof of the bus anywhere else in India except in Bang.. Not even during the times of travelling in the crapiest of the buses in Chennai.
6)I am pretty sure(not fully though) in most of the buses in Chennai its written in English... but ironically and shockingly i hardly find any buses with a speck of english in Bang..
Finally,
Being a tam, I have a psychological attachment towards Chennai and an instinctive attachment towards Bangalore... and well home sweet home "Aamchi Mumbai".

Shailesh R Nadar
4:15 pm, Jul 12, 2008.

A Tribute!! to wing-mates and wingmen!! :P

Its been almost three years since I came here… living with friends... away from family… well this kinda in itself is one… Its time to pay some tribute to the second family…Over a period of time of knowing people… their names don’t jus remain names… they signify complicated emotions :P …they ring a bell…
Well here are a few!
Lets start with
Chandu:
chan (v):
1. It refers to that novel way of RG ing in which u pain the shit out of people by saying nothing at all, well obviously unintended!! You are kept from knowing vital info, which apparently haunts you big time later.
2.This refers to joining someone in their endeavors, working on it and then kicking the main guy out and taking his place… For further info contact Satyaram… Cuz he sure has been brutally channed many times.
Usage: to chan, channing, to be channed, to have got channed etc. etc.

Hussain:
huss(v):
It refers to the plain, on the face lying with no apparent motive but just to make a fool out of the listener. It differs from fooling in the sense hussing is most often caught very soon… But gotta be aware while talking to him else “Dude!! You are so hussed!!”
Usage: to huss, hussing, to get hussed, etc. etc

Bulla, the great! (title the great is self proclaimed!!)
bulla (v):
to pull out a bulla(phr.)

MEANING DELETED BECAUSE OF PERSONAL DISSENT!!

Usage: “Gosh! You almost pulled out a bulla!”, “stop bullaying”, to get bullaed, to bulla etc etc.

The Big J
jayantise (v):
It’s a new found way of socializing, in which you befriend an almost unknown person in moments (by using all the PR skills u possess in one flow) that by the end of the day you are only a bit less than ‘langotiya yaars’
PS: Big J was a PR coordinator for Saarang ‘08
Usage: to jayantise, jayantising, to get jayantised etc etc

Pondy… (for those ignorant enough: Tummala Yashwanth)
pondy(n):
Refers to a person who despite of having all sorts of comforts luxuries and happiness, feels that he is the unhappiest person on the planet!
Eg. A guy studying in one of the premier institutes of the world, having a CG of more than 8.5, undoubtedly having a great future.. but still comes up with the most depressing status messages of all times!! Pure statistics… 9 outta his 10 status messages contain the creature :(

Here comes the Heavy weight
Poorna Chander Reddy (aka Reddy gaaru.. aka Full Moon Reddy)
to poorna (v):
Content too offensive to display… anyways for most of those reading this, the meaning must be obvious… for those who don’t it wd be granted only on personal request!
--- By the order of “ the one who is always right!”
Yet to come: to dopa, to black hole, revised version of “to poorna” and many more! :P

Shailesh R Nadar
3:20 pm, Feb 18, 2008.

Twists and turns in turning twenty…

Here I sit barely 100 min left in my teenage. I plan to use it in the best possible way, I can and sit down to write this…(I seriously doubt my decision though!)
Soon would end my cheerful and fun filled run as a teenager… and so would the infamous resolution I made some six months back! (Which unfortunately was never “close” to its completion)
I wd no more enjoy the status of being a “kid”… edging out of troubles and responsibilities! Though I am yet to use a “shaving cream” to shave my non existent beard I would suddenly be called a “young man”. I fear I wd just double up the already sky kissing expectations people have from me… jus coz I m turning twenty!
One thing though, I would no more be written off in every damn matter saying I am jus a kid! Coz I wd be twenty, and have (at least) a say in anything and everything.
I guess its a warning bell… saying I must get serious with life! If it is, I sure hate to hear its crystal clear ringing in my ear!
Anyways..this Dec 3 I wont just be completing another year, But another decade! A decade filled with struggle, fear, anxiety, achievements, let downs, happiness, sadness and loads of unfulfilled expectations which would be carried on to the next!
Sometimes I feel be I didn’t do complete justice to my teenage, didn’t make use of it all that well, But on second thought I sure did better than many others!!!!

Shailesh R Nadar
11:10 pm, Dec 2, 2007.

Crash.. r ther!!

“Sleep is the second most pleasurable thing to do.. so go n enjoy every bit of it.”

--- SHAILESH R. NADAR

Well sleep was never an issue before comin here(IIT).. it was never such an integral part of ma life as it is now.. Though the hours have remained more or less the same or may be even reduced they seem much more meaningful now.
Now I realize the so called “sleep” I used to sleep was more a mechanical activity. Bed at 12 or 1and rise at 7or 8. Same shit over and over again.
Never knew the thrill of goin into a nite... not knowing when u gonna sleep…

I quite mastered the art of sleeping, over the years, And have broadly classified them into six types..

1. Most normal kind of nite sleep: its those times wen u ready ur bed wen ur eyes start to wink, then put off the comp, lite, go to the bog(I spose every one does that), set the alarm and hit the sack well prepared.. and yaa even keep a bottle of water near your bed. You drift into sleep with a faint smile.Zzzzzzzzzzz..

2.We came, we saw, we collapsed kinda sleeps: Remember those times, jus back from baddy at 1, or jus walked all the way from main-gate from a late nite treat. Your body starts listening to ur muscles before it does to ur brain, which BTW stops functioning by that time. Forget latching the doors, the only thing u ever do before goin to bed is remove ur footwear. Dhumm dhadaash!! Hit the bed with a audible sound.Zzzzzzz

3. Late nite ooops early morning sleeps: Those weekends wen u wait for the world to sleep.. putting movie marathons on ur comp. They happen wen u r really satisfied with urself… like comin outta quizzes alive…etc etc. Time keeps ticking… 2am… 3am… 4am… 5am … and with the first stroke of sunlight u start yawning and hit the bed with little or no idea about when u gonna wake up!! Zzzzzzz

4. Afternoon sleeps: As against the general notion of sleeps this sleep doesn’t reenergize or refresh u but drains energy outta u and leaves u good for nothing for the rest of the day. But still, till date the most satisfying of all the sleeps… U feel doped wen u fall(Mind u I don dope..)… may be the word “crash” has its origin from here… doze off with mouth open totally unaware of things around. Zzzzzzzzz

5.MSB(Mech. Sciences Block) sleeps: Being in Mechanical, I dare not miss this!! Those hours of LVR(Man Tech), Design of Machine Elements and Heat transfer which we spent sleeping.. Though these sleeps are shallow, believe me you can even manage to have dreams if u r in the right place… Aaah awesome experience!!

6.Miscellaneous: And then ther are sleeps which fall in neither of the above categories. What do u call wen u wake up at nine and fall asleep agin by 10.30, when u doze off at 6 in the evening and wake up by 9. Well, I classify them under the misc. category.

That was SLEEP... classified for you!!!

Aaaaaaaggrrrh !! enough of classification... its 11.30 pm already..
I gotta CRASH!!!

Shailesh R Nadar
11:31 pm, Oct 28, 2007.

A nite of the tsunami.. a nite with "Chak De"

Till now I held an impeccable record(twenty years) of never been wet by the splash of rain water by passing vehicles, only to be broken on sunday in a truly magnaimous way.
Sunday evening we were all set to go for the most awaited "Chak de". We got down at thousand lights and everything was fine until it started drizzling and moments later raining. we ran to seek shelter to the nearby bus stop. Waited for 20 mins or so... soon it was time for the show so we decided to brave ourselves through the rain. And ironically the rain almost stopped as soon as wee came out. But to gen put pseud I held my hankie over my head to prevent my hair from the sparsely falling drops. May be the psued puttin was jus too much, the next moment I was in wet from from head to toe supposedly by a wave, a foot or two taller than me. I was stunned, Cmon it was the sidewalk not even the road and i had taken bath hardly an hour ago and din deserve another bath.
Wet inside out I went on to enjoy the best Bollywood movie I have ever seen... "Chak de! India".
God level direction, lotta attention to details, Shahrukh at his best, geniune hockey moves, stud level background music, spirited dialouges and girls and girls everywhere!!!! What more do u want?
What!!! still readin!!! Go, catch the movie.

Shailesh R Nadar
9:10 am, Aug 15, 2007.

Still a Virgin????...... Aaaah cut the crap..

It was sunday afternoon... absolutely nothing to do... so went around personalising the stuff in my new room #360 SARAS.. by writing my name on the door, window, almirah. "Virgin" in cursive as in the virgin of "Virgin Atlantic".
It was then it suddenly struck how weird my name was. The name I hated at first.The name which invited oohs and aahs whenever someone heard it. Everyone.. believe me each and everyone, be it seniors or batchmates made a point to ask "So.... still a virgin haan?".. What the f**k... "Well how many times have you ****** dude" was the way I almost always wanted to retort, but i never did. In third year.. and I still encounter people who end up asking the same question.
Well time passed and I started liking my name... albeit christened "virgin" for the rest of the stay in the campus and the funda behind the name as lame as "You never ****** ** (oops!! censored by CCB) before coming to IIT.. so u r a virgin"... (Well in Chandler Bing's words "Can it.. BE any lamer??"). Still it didnt seem that bad. Not as bad as others.. (The CBB (Censor Board of Blogging) disallows me to put those names up here, so I ideally refrain from doin so.)
Infact now I feel happy or even proud (as u may say)..of the same name. proud enough that I have even created a sign (pic above) to paste on my door. Ironical is'nt it??

Shailesh R Nadar
4:50 pm, Aug 12, 2007.

P.S.-- The nick names at IIT Madras are strictly given by seniors after an extensive interactive session("ragging" in crude words). And these are the names which are carried forward for the next 4 or 5 yrs.

Letter to a betrayed mate(oops!!... sorry Prez.)

Dr Kalam,
This is Shailesh, from a corner in the western part of the country, one of the many young minds you successfully ignited!! I feel sorry for you deserved a much better sent off.... I feel sorry for you were ruthlessly betrayed. You were the best till now and in times to come. No wonder you flip-flopped.. you are a scientist after all and not a politician.. But great!! that you stood your ground in the end. Don worry about presidentship. You, Dr APJ Abdul Kalam being The President of the Republic of India was a honour to the post itself and not vice versa. You did what no one did... and probably would never be able to do as a president:
You won a billion hearts,
Inspired a billion minds.
But you were too upright to please the rotten rasculs of the Congress... Doesnt matter... for no one cares. The most coveted position in India has just become more coveted(for you had occupied it). Tommorow you may not be the President but will still remain the the only man who dreamt and taught us to dream of a Developed and a Better India. We love and respect you (as we would always do) becoz you are Kalam... not because you are the President.. Finally HATS OFF TO YOU Mr Kalam. I am proud to have walked the Earth with a man of your stature...
GO KALAM!!! YOU ROCK!!!

Regards,
Shailesh R Nadar

8:18 pm, 26th June, 2007